28 June 2015

Download my new book from any Amazon

'A Year in Provence meets Hotel Babylon' (Daily Mail)

Content: House-hunting in Gascony (SW France) is not for the fainthearted as Peter (48) and Jan (45) discover. But they find their dream house. Starting its renovation they not only find an old grenade, but a bunch of secret papers as well. They are shocked being told about a murder in the village, threatened by snakes and other vermin and a mysterious derelict neighbouring farm seems to be booby-trapped, but why? 

Jan wants to convert the house into a small luxury hotel but all Peter wants is a holiday home. Over time Peter’s resistance is eroded. What a woman wants…The house back home is sold, a flat found. They are now in France most of the time. The hotel is in business. Jan has interviewed Yvette, a local girl to help her with the rooms. 

Delayed guests have arrived. Honeymooners. A ghost from the past drops in, Hugo Sanchez, claiming the house is his. Jan kicks out the first guests. New guests arrive, two househunting couples. The males starting a pissing contest. Peter gets his first Ferrari. A French neighbour explains why the British are strange people and that cave people were the first foreigners who came house hunting in France, 25.000 BC. 
Still in bed Peter finally meets Yvette, the new chambermaid. Is the baker’s wife unfaithful? How do the French call gay men? Yvette teaches Peter new techniques…about French bread. Dave, an Englishman pops in to pick Peter’s builders brains. 

Four German guests arrive with quite unusual tastes. Peter makes a shocking discovery in their bedroom. What is Yvette doing in a swingers club? Hugo Sanchez is seen again in the area, but what is he up to? 
Peter misjudges his young American guests. A dog selects a new master. A letter arrives from Spain from the man who claims he is the owner of the house. They learn the most popular word in Ireland. 

A Belgian guest has an unpleasant wake up call. Terrorists are seen in the area. New neighbour Dave dies. Peter checks out a potential terrorists’ lair. A truly international and eventful day in a small Gascon hotel. 
Guests have their car stolen. Dave’s bereaved brother arrives. Pictures of Jan’s interior are taken for Elle Decoration. A fireplace has travelled from Gascony to Amsterdam. and back. New guests are not what they were expected to be. 
Scantily clad models pose around the pool for a glossy magazine photoshoot, soon joined by a naked Yvette. 

Hugo Sanchez takes Peter on his Nazi treasure hunt, to the local graveyard! Then Peter’s biggest secret is revealed. A real Hollywood actress and her baby-faced lover arrive. They are desperate to find out the identity of the famous singer/songwriter is who keeps to his room. Another guest makes a confession that ends the treasure hunt. 

Peter is invited to cook at a Hollywood wedding. A guest smells someone smoking pot and wants some himself. Jan plans a party. A bachelor tells Peter of a very un-orthodox way to find his bride. Somebody gets arrested by the Gendarmerie. Another one marries the wrong bride. An old colleague and his wife stop over. A lone guest discovers an interesting notebook in the library. A hare catches a dog. Eight expats who come for lunch are having severe problems. The party is a huge success but the next day Peter has a total blackout. Is Yvette getting married? 

Warning: although I paid professionals UK editors I'm told the book still has grammatical errors. At the moment corrections are being made. The result will be ready to download on August 5. 

Then download here (or any other Amazon site) to read on your tablet, PC, phone or Kindle:


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